LiOfOrchid/Jokes
Bad Exalted jokes. New stuff at the bottom.
Many of these were formed by Quendalon's TenThousandBrokenDreams players.
For one, there's The Gatling Gun of Eternal Dawn, a gun that shoots Dawn Caste Solars as its ammunition. Yep.
We're also big on Dave Chappelle parodies.
"What did the Five Solars say to the Scarlet Empress?" "What?" "SLAP!"
"Chejop Kejak, you hateful sunuvabitch. I wish you ill! I wish you ill, Kejak!"
Yeah. This will be cooler on a day when I feel funnier. :)
"Slightly Bitter Fuzzy Bunny, the Cuddliest Deathknight", a character concept by Tepet Aekino.
Last game, we came across a vast collection of daiklaves, more than we could possibly hope to use, or even carry. So I had the great idea of maximizing the number of daiklaves each Exalt could have... by attaching a daiklave to either end of a lightning chain. DAIKLAVE-CHUCKS! WHOOO! (compliments to www.nuklearpower.com)
Lightbulb Jokes
from rpg.net:
Q: "How many Solar Exalted does it take to change a lightbulb?" -Hong
A: NONE, FOR THEY GLOW WITH THE BURNING ANIMA OF THE UNCONQUERED SUN HIMSELF, FOOLISH MORTAL!
(or maybe 2) -Vitriol
How about "How many Exalted does it take to screw in a lightbulb?"
"Two. One to hold the light bulb and one to rotate all of creation!" I know it's bad but I just heard it somewhere. Honest!
--BrilliantRain
Q: How many Exalts does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 3100. 150 to plan the Usurpation of the First Lightbulb, 450 to defend it to a man, and the remaining 2500 to overwhelm them and establish a new but equally nonfunctional lightbulb in its place. ...DeathBySurfeit
Q: How many Lunars does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: "You would dare ask us to help spread more of your decadant civilisation? Die! *shifts into DBF and kills the questioner and eats his heart as he was without honor*"
or
A: Depends on if they have Humble Mouse Shape. If yes, two. Otherwise none. (I know that was a very dirty joke)
--BrilliantRain
Q: How many Bronze Faction Sidereals does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: One, but he has to talk five other people into doing it and it gets replaced by a bulb that he says is longer lasting but it burns out two weeks later.
And
Q: How many Gold Faction Sidereals does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None, they would rather try to fix the original bulb.
--BrilliantRain
Q: How many Dragon-Blooded does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. They have servants for that.
--BrilliantRain
Q: How many Abyssals does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None, as they prefer the dark. Who do you think broke the first one, anyway?
--BrilliantRain
Q: How many Fair Folk does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One. The real question is what it changes into. -Ben-San
