SJE/Session23
Exalted Session 23
Cathak Anarias rage-twisted face screams hatred as she launches at her cousin Cathak Alana. Her twin red-jade daiklaives stab out, invoking her Cleansing Fire Combo. Alana dodges under then and tries to disarm the Immaculate, but Anaria has Fire Dragon form up and is near impossible to touch. Anaria responds instinctively- scrunching her face up- for a moment it appears draconic, before exhaling out a great blast of flame! Alana gets it full blast, clothes igniting, hair charring!
But still Alana goes for the non-lethal, despite the agony of the fire, she disarms one of Alana’s daiklaives and makes an impassioned plea- “Stop cousin! I am not the enemy! Demons march upon Gem!”
“Demons you have lead here, Anathaema disgrace!” spits Anaria, casually gutting a too-brave Tiger Warrior.
Alana dashes forward, her golden daiklaive flicking Anarias remaining daiklaive out of her grasp and high into the air.
“I could kill you now cousin, but listen!”
From far off, the desert wind brings the sound of marching feet, the deep repeated boom of brass drums and a strange high flute tune of madness.
“Malfeas comes! Put aside your hatred and help save Gem, cousin! I don’t want to kill you”, the emotion tearing from Alana’s voice (12 successes with Masterful Perfomance!)
Anaria pauses- conflict written across her face. Her Conviction wars with her Intellect Somehow, impossibly, intellect wins. The red-headed Immaculate turns and picks up her swords. Alana resists the urge to stab her in the back.
“Very well, we shall resume this on the last day of Calibration. But if you betray Gem, I shall kill you instantly” Says a broken-voiced Anaria.
”Thank you, cousin” says Alana
“Don’t tell Aron. It would break his heart” is Anaria parting shot over her shoulder as she walks away from her Anathaema cousin.
In the background, the demon army draws up on Gem. A multitude of strange grey and greenskinned creatures form this host- strange, long legged Hopping Puppeteers, clouds of swirling metal, deer made from intertwining tentacles, thuggish grey skinned apes and more. In the centre a large, slope browed giant carries a club the size of a pillar (Octavion, the Living Tower). In front of the army, a central dancer (Stanewald the Dancer) leads a procession of Neomah in an intricate dance to the sound of maddening flutes and pipes.
Meanwhile Rav, Orchid, Brand and the Captain are hiding out below the mountain, reovering from their fight to the death with the Captains evil soul-twin, Son of Crows. But as the temperature drops, the silence lengthens and the goosebumps raise on their flesh, they realise another old friend is down here with them. The Lord of Silent Repose is here, and he wants the Abyssals body and Monstrance.
Fortunately he is willing to negotiate (damn Moonshadows!) and so a long summit is held between the Solars (who want to kill him) and the Abyssal (who wants to kill everyone on principle)
(Lord of Silent Repose was played by a guest player, so I missed all the good lines- please add!)
Eventually they hammer out a deal, and Orchid sanctifies the following Oath.
“I, The Lord of Silent Repose swear to seek out requisition the aid of as many Abyssal Exalted as possible, within the shortest reasonable amount of time, and to persuade them to report to the Gem City Watch with all expedience and agree to be bound to oaths for the purpose of destroying the demon army currently besieging Gem”
They swear “We, members of Gem City Watch,will give possession of the remains of Son of Crows to the Lord of Silent Repose on swearing his oath”.
So they do, (mostly as an act of good faith) but keep the bits of the Monstrance. Rav pockets some bits just so it can never be completely re-assembled.
My response? “You are inviting an Abyssal Circle into Gem!!!!!!!” Them “Not so much”
During this time, Jaq has been wandering around the Palace, dodging clerks and trying to locate the Despots Yasal Crystal Collection. Unfortunately, on trying to break into the Jewel Room, he is spotted by guards who give chase. Running into Tanaka and Auntie, he is soon captured and clapped in chains after Tanaka unmakss her as the Black Mouse! The Captain of the Palace guard orders him taken to the Scorpion Pits!
Rav heads leaves the summit early and flies over to the Temple of 5 Harmonius Dragons. Its very busy tonight as the faithful pack the main worship chamber, praying for deliverance from the demons beyond the wall. Turning into a Gekko, Rav crawls through the temple. He finds a distraught Anaria on her knees before a statue to Hesiah in a private chamber, asking of her Dragon “Have I done the right thing, Enlightened One? Should I slay the Anathaema, or hold back my fires as you once did, till I can burn all the demons away? Please Hesiah, guide me!” Anaria’s anima burns as brightly as a bonfire through out.
At last finds the store chamber where copies of the Immaculate Texts are stored. Sprinkling the scroll with firedust powder, Rav uses his Changing Moon anima to adopt the illusory disguise of a monk before cutting and desecrating the scrolls. He especially ruins the Fire Dragon scrolls. Then he starts a commotion, calling for other monks and spreading the word that demons have desecrated the Texts!
Anaria comes running, damping her flames as she enters the store room. That’s when Rav points to the scroll marked “The Way of Hesiah” which has been shredded.
“NO!” screams the already emotionally volatile Anaria. A flicker of flame haloing her.
BOOOM!
That small spark catches on the firedust impregnated scrolls, and the small room turns it into a concussive blast, the explosion sending monks, Anaria and Rav flying! They’ll live, but the spare Texts are well and truly destroyed. Now all Rav must do is destroy the main texts in the public worship area. Just five scrolls to go to fulfill Ssseths Task.
Cathak Aron has meanwhile caught up with the Captain in a tavern
“YOU!”
“Me?” says the Captain
“DUEL TO THE DEATH YOU SAID! HURRY UP! CHOP, CHOP MAN!”
“He’s not feeling too well” says Orchid. “Can we do this later”
“LATER!” bellows Aron “I’VE BEEN WAITING ALL DAY FOR HIIM! HE WANTS TO DUEL WITH KEGS OF BEER! WE KEEP DRINKING TILL ONE OF US DIES!”
“I did?” says the Captain, the drunken challenges of the night before coming back to him. A delighted smile crosses his face at the thought of all that alcohol. (Our table falls about laughing)
”YES! NOW GET A MOVE ON, It’s been so long, I’ve even started early” slurs Aron.
“Captain, you cant go get drunk with a Demon Army on the doorstep!” harangues an irritated Orchid who cant believe what she is hearing.
“Ah, well… Matter of Honour isn’t it. Don’t worry, I’ll be back soon. Cant keep Cathak Aron waiting!” (rolls his Temperance dice. Fails)
“Captain!” screams Orchid in annoyance
“Well they have opened the barrels already.. cant let it go to waste” yells the Captain as he heads off with Aron to do battle till one dies of drunkenness.
Its at this point that Floating Summer Orchid is finally so irritated by the childish and intemperate ways of the world (or Captain) that she Limit Breaks.
The Captain has meanwhile made it to Cathak Arons apartments in the Diamond Palace. 40 barrels of beer have been set out around the edges of the room in two rows. Thrusting a huge flagon into the Captains hand, the burly Aron declaims “To Your Death, Sir” and the duel begins. Both begin drinking as much ale as quickly as they can.
The Captain stunts- surprising Aron by pulling out and donning a pair of fake breasts Blackadder-style he exclaims “Wey-Hey! RARR! Last one to die is a big girls blouse!”” and starts quaffing. Aron is put out that he doesn’t have a pair of fake breasts and bets that if he can finish his barrel first, he can have a go of the fake boobies. The Captain agrees, but the cunning Aron uses his Sweeten the Tap charm to make his ale extra-smooth and downs it in a one-er. Now Aron has the stunt-breasts!
Soon they are on the second and third casks, Aron still in the lead, the Captain a little woozy. Aron keeps toasting their Deaths. (or was it Health? Hard to remember). By the 4th barrel, Aron is slowing down, the Captain catching up with him. They start to reminisce and Aron mentions he has a twin- a humourless Dragon-botherer called Anaria.
Captain “Anaria? PHWOAR! I’d give her one.”
Aron “Thasht my sishter you are talking about!” and swings a punch at the Captain. He misses obviously, and exclaims “Hey, you got a twin too!” seeing double.
“Don’t fight, drink!” shouts the Captain, and honour satisfied for the moment, they start on their 5th cask each. Both Exalts are reeling now, but the Captain seems to have his second wind. Aron is getting, really, really drunk. After saying something about how much he loves the Captain, he busts open the bottom of an empty barrel and dons it, singing “I’m a little teapot… short and stout…”. Aron in his barrel falls onto their side.
Both men are really drunk now- everything is haze, feet unsteady, co-ordination going. Somehow the Captain helps his friend keep drinking by tipping the 6th cask directly into the fallen Arons mouth…
On the 7th cask, the Captain still has his feet and after drinking his, tips the paralytic Aron head first into a new barrel. “Glug… glug…gluggg.” –slowly level of beer in the cask falls as Aron, head underwater, keeps drinking!
Then the final “glug………” and silence. Aron, head first deep in the ale barrel isn’t moving. The Captain falls forward, knocking the two over and cradles the near drowned Aron to him.
“Do you concshede” he slurs
“Urg…” says Aron.
“I’ll take that ash a Yeshhh” goes the Captain. “D’ya swear to fight the demons termerrow?”
“Shure, whatever…. URG!” mutters a drunken Aron before projectile vomiting over the Captain.
The Captain puts him to bed, then takes one step too many and falls slowly backward onto the floor. His eyes close at last, his enemy defeated.
Outside, in the field of battle before Gem, the dancing demons continue their intricate waltz. From deep below, the earth begins to rumble and shake….
The 1st of Calibration is over. Rav has 2 days to live. Tanaka seeks a fugitive Brand. Jaq is escaping the scorpion pits, stung and poisoned. Orchid now has a Heart of Flint, emotionless and purposeful, no sacrifice of others too great.
Tick…tick…TICK!
(I should describe some of Jaq’s misadventures. After 3 guards see through his “I’m not here’ Charm (while he is unlocking the Jewel Room) he is chased by the firewand wielding (& botching) guards down a corridor. He races round a corner and almost into Auntie and Master Tanaka, who both see through his malfunctioning Stealth Charm.
Tanaka also sees through Jaqs maid disguise, and pulling off her wig, he reveals Jaq to be the Black Mouse, whose reign of crime is now at an end. People are surprised to find Jaq is in fact a woman.
Thrown into the Scorpion Pits, Jaq must remain very, very still as Janitor Ymes (former Captain of the Palace Guard, now head of Scorpion Replenishment and Feeding) throws in his darlings. Jaq dare not move or be stung!
Taking her time, Jaq strikes faster than a scorpion, his foot pinning it to the ground as his shackled hand whips out and pulls off the scorpions tail! Using the stinger as a lockpick, she then unlocks his shackles and rests up as the other scorpions crawl over her.
Essence recharged, she then tries Flow Like Blood to shake off the shackles and scorpions and leap up to the top of the pit (where we discover that Exalted physics are whacked and an ordinary person can standing jump up their own height. I think not) Unfortunately Jaq is stung along the way, and starts to suffer poisoning.
Strangling Ymes to unconsciousness, she then steals the dungeon keys and makes her escape. Along the way, she sees another prisoner- a Mime, held in another scorpion pit- inscribed in the pit is the message “Learn The Words” (We joke the mime had remained safe by hiding in his invisible box). Throwing caution to the wind, and unleashing another horror upon destruction-prone Gem, Jaq throws the mime down a rope, freeing this Evil Upon the World once more. We’ll have to see the ramifications of that one, later.
Jaq then stuggles up to the Harem where the girls shelter and protect her from the ensuing hue and cry. Unfortunately Jaq cant find her confiscated equipment, including her Soulsteel Gyro Chakram.)
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