SJE/Session13

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Exalted Session 13

The Ambassadors Reception

The Watch have finally made it to the Diamond Palace, the heart of Gems court, government, wealth, power and heritage.

So naturally they are there under fake names.

Orchid has been able to acquire 2 invites- one for the Deputy Khan Fast Horse (envoy from Chiaroscuro) and guest. Ravitsu shape changes into the form of a Chiaroscuron he once met and calls himself Assistant Deputy Khan Lightning Spear and takes the Captain along as his guest.

Meanwhile, our cross-dressing couple (Jaq and Orchid) settle for going as Mr & Mrs Batholith, water importers for Gem. We have a guest PC- Daring Hare (not his real name), the greatest lover in all of Creation, outrageous liar, conman and sneak thief extraordinaire. He is here to get his leg over, set someone up as the Black Mouse and steal the Dynasts Diadem, the largest Diamond in all of Creation.

(Guest list to follow)

They get to the grand Diamond Palace, an ornate, ostentatious structure at the peak of the volcano. The Walls are near transparent- as if made of great, foot thick sheets of diamond, the floor marbled, tapestries gold-threaded.

In the Great Ballroom the nobility, merchants, administrators, diplomatic corps and bourgeoisie of Gem witness Ambassador Hollow Reed of Paragon presenting his credentials, the Despot accepting them. The Paragonese Ambassador then offers Gem (in the spirit of ‘friendship’) access to Paragons oath rod, allowing the whole populace of Gem to be bound to the Laws of Gem and thus doing away with the need for a Watch. Tumbleweed rolls through the ballroom as everyone thinks through the implications and the Despot politely thanks the Ambassador and welcomes him to what is sure to be a long stay here. Demi Prefect Shania, the blonde assistant somehow keeps and eye on everybody.

The Captain catches the eye of his arch-rival, Major Ymes of the Palace Guard and makes a rude gesture subtly. Ymes goes apoplectic.

Now the Reception. Flunkeys and courtiers dressed in tights and brocaded overcoats supply wine and Ferroro Roche (cue “Wiv zees Ferrro Roche, you are spoiling uz!” quotes as the players tuck in!) as a 100 man orchestra provide the music.

People mix, mingle and scheme. Orchid tries some social mountaineering- heading for the Despot. Along the way she speaks to Mother Sahlak (who sounds her out about some private sector Thaumaturgy and mentions how something always came up that prevented her from meeting the Inconstant Hierophant) and the Despots Great Aunt Marigold, (73 don’t you know) his last remaining living relative. (think Joan Hickson of Mrs Marple fame- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Joan_Hickson_is_Miss_Marple.jpg )

Aunt Marigold seems a harmless old biddy, but her questioning of Orchid does test her fake ID, for Marigold is “73 don’t you know, and isn’t a nice party they put on isn’t? And her nephew is such a good boy, and why when she was a bit younger, she used to volunteer a lot, met a lot of young babies at the hospital, and what was your maiden name dear? Chastity was it? Well she knew a Hiram Chastity and family back in the day, but my, didn’t they have a boy, dear? Your cousin dear? Of course, at my ages, the memory plays tricks doesn’t ? I’m 73 did you know?”

The Captain has what he thinks is a quiet (or loud, drunken, booming) word with General Dragonroar, warning him of the coup. Dragonroar is perhaps even more OTT (and drunk) than the Captain and booms back something about the “thieves don’t like cold steel and hot firedust up them, and its all piffle and nonsense, thieves don’t have the courage to stand and fight like men! Hurrah!”

Rav mixes, Jaq baits Righteous Serpent and mentions the break in (which the Cult of Ssseth never reported) and Righteous Serpent begins eyeing Jaq like a hungry cobra spotting a baby mouse….

Dashing Hare establishes that the Dynastic Diadem is in a vault deep in the bowels of the Palace. He also establishes that young Topaz Dari is probably the most beautiful woman at the party, but alas he has competition from the supra-rich young rake Fareem Iblan. It appears that Topaz and Fareem are going all Romeo and Juliet until Dashing Hare accidentally on purpose spills his drink on Fareem and then begins wooing virginal Topaz with extravagant one lines (or cheesy chat-ups)

Jaq spots someone with the emblem of the First and Forsaken Lion (mailed fist, sword and chains) and follows him to discover the Lord of Silent Repose is in the Palace (but not the party) and plotting to divide the “southern territories, south of the Lap” with an unknown party, who turns out to be probably Hollow Reed.

The Captain heads for the Despot, but is intercepted by Major Ymes and the two archrivals engage in a verbal battle of the wits (the Captain comes off to the worse of course after “Your useless men do nothing but take the Despots shit out to the dump, Major” “Then they’ve had enough practice to remove you from the Palace Captain!”, “If I’m shit then…. Oh wait” ) , insults exchanged, slanders made, the Major finally has his men throw the Captain out.

In the corridor the Captain activates his Dawn caste anima to appear momentarily terrifying to the guards and uses the shock to bang their heads together and knock them out. Orchid (who has just warned the Despot of the coup. The Despot didn’t seem that surprised by the news) walks in on the this and the Captain presses her into dragging the unconscious guards into the cloakroom and stealing their clothes, comedy style.

Orchid and the Captain are now roaming the Palace looking for evidence that Valtess is in on the coup, dressed as Palace Guards. Dashing Hare has successfully seduced the 18 year old Topaz with some intense love poetry (3 stunt dice, even from our East German judge! 10 successes!). The two arrange an assignation in the Despots private Gardens in an hour, and Dashing Hare races off. Rav and Jaq are in the ballroom keeping an eye on things.

They spot a guard come in and speak urgently to Ymes. Ymes disappears and then returns shortly, red-faced and worried- he speaks to Lord Steward Valtess. The Despot isn’t around. The two stride off quickly.

Ravistsu and Jaq turn on their Stealth charms and follow. They get enough successes to hear Valtess say “ WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE DESPOT IS MISSING? HE CANT JUST DISAPPEAR! !” (and damningly) “HOW ON EARTH CAN WE OVERTHROW HIM, IF HE ISINT HERE TO BE OVERTHROWN!”

At this the pair turn a corner to the Admin wing and find Orchid and Captain en flagrante with an unconscious Palace Guard. Jaq and Rav appear from behind them

Jaq- “Lord Valtess, Major Ymes, I’m arresting you for crimes against the State”

Valtess “I AM THE STATE, YOU FOOL!!”

Jaq “Your have the right to remain silent, the right to have a lawyer present (etc)….”

Valtess- “YARGHHHH!”

Acrimonious argument as everyone tries to throw their authority about. Valtess and Ymes try to fight their way out, then just run. Ymes and the Captain trade sword blows, (and then hurled Petunia pots) as Lords are tripped and Majors nicked.

Realising that they have just arrested the acting Head of State for Gem and the Captain of the Palace Guard our intrepid four confer.

Dashing Hare has meanwhile broken into the vault containing the Dynasts Diadem and stolen it, leaving a Black mouse figurine in its place. A second figurine has already been planted on Fareem Iblan. Hare then makes it back in time to make the rendezvous with Topaz and they embrace under the light of the midnight moon.

A little while later, his reputation as the greatest lover in all of Creation maintained, Hare flees (having lied to his lover that he will return for her) and glances up.

Above he sees a huge Eagle-hawk (Rav) carrying a bound and gagged Ymes winging its way out of the Palace. Alas the aerial wards around the Palace activate and the flier is fried with eldritch orange energy as a warding dome shimmers into activation. Ravitsu tries to push through the ward, but it is too strong and he returns to the others, their plan to smuggle out the arrested officials of Gem in tatters as the Palace Guard respond to the activated wards.

Desperate, Orchid pulls some feathers from Rav telling him to go human and urges the Captain to slay Ymes. Then they’ll scatter the feathers around his corpse and name him as the Anathaema! The Captain lunges at his bound and gagged enemy (fails a Compassion roll, so I let it happen, though I wonder if he should lose a point of Compassion for the act?), but Jaq deflects most of the killing blow with a quick parry of his own.

At this point the Palace Guards break through the Admin wing door and see 4 members of the City Watch armed, Lord Steward Valtess bound and gagged, and the Captain of the Guard stabbing the Major of the Palace Guard! It’s a coup by the City Watch!

But Orchid’s social fu just manages to slow their charge and avert open war in the corridors of the Diamond Palace. She wants them to go away, they want medical aid for Major Ymes and a trial. Weapons are gripped, knuckles tightened as an impasse develops, neither side willing to back down. As sweat pours, the mass of Palace Guards encircle the 4 members of the Watch, blood still pouring from Ymes chest!... …. Tick….tick…. tick.. Mexican standoff….

“Ah gentlemen, look at all this trouble, and I’ve only been away 15 minutes!” says a familiar voice, stepping from a shadowed doorway. It’s the Despot.

Hubbub as everyone starts talking at once- orders requested, evidence offered, garbled explanations.

“Now, lets all sheathe our weapons… Get medical aid for Ymes… If he’s guilty, we wouldn’t want to deprive the scorpions of their meal, would we?”

((Sotto voce from Jaqs player “I think we’ve just met someone even creepier than the Abyssal!”)

“The Coup Sir?!”- blurts the Captain.

“Yes, well why don’t you go raid those houses Captain. That’ll be very proactive of you, wont it? As for this lot, leave them to me.” Says the Despot.

The Captain races off to smash the Thieves Guild with military support. Orchid finds herself taking tea with Great Aunt Marigold.

“Y’know, I’m not actually Mrs Chastity- Batholith” confesses Orchid.

“That’s nice dear. More tea?” pours an unfazed Great Aunt.

And Jaq? Well just as he’s leaving, there is another commotion. More Palace Guards racing about, shouting. It seems the master thief known as the Black Mouse has stolen the largest diamond in all of Creation from under the noses of the Palace Guard!

“Damn, I didn’t even get to see it!” laments a surprised master thief…..

So ends the Case of the Errant Explosives and the kicking of the Black Mouse Thefts up into high gear.


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