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Exalted Session 51

Trouble in Paradise

20th Ascending Air RY 769.

So the Watch are in Heaven. Gawping like tourists, they make their way through the wonders of Yu Shan, its tall white towers, great green parks, huge bridges over quicksilver canals and more. They see the corn dole of the Quintessence Distribution, and even wander through a derelict district of slum mansions, idly wondering if they were the remnants of Celestial Exalts homes in Yu Shan.

Brand and Rav try to convince the others not to draw attention to themselves (still Brand feels like they are being watched) but when they come across the six-armed Tharggon, small time Gawd of Hoods, mugging the vagrant-gawds Gen (God of Nexus) and the green skinned, fin-eared Eastern Gawd of Domesticated Dolphins of their Quintessence, then Ravs compassion kicks in and he steps in. The others back his play, and soon Tharggon has his ill gotten gain pick-pocketed off him, the smelly hobo-gods rescued, and Gen in a moment of lucidity mentioning to Orchid “Your body lies under Nexus”.

Along the way, they find the “Yu Shan Times” - a daily periodical (edited by the embittered First Age God of Mass Communications) telling of events in both Creation and Heaven. There is even a new section called “Focus on Gem” by Ssseth. It’s a bitchy gossip column which archly mentions how local Solar Exalt Floating Summer Orchid has been seen “walking out with ivory skinned seductress Maiden of the Mirthless Smile” and decrying the miscegenation of SolarSJE/Abyssal relationships. “We never walked anywhere!” exclaims an outraged Orchid.

Eventually they make it to Burning Feathers house- it’s a sizeable white marble mansion with acres of grounds around it. ( I reason, the Goddess of Intoxicants is a fairly major Greater Gawd). The Fountains around shoot champagne into the air, and the interior of the mansion is filled with the soft fumes of marijuana. The Captain pays visit to his good lady wife, while the others get slowly high. Unfortunately it’s a bit early in the morning for Burning Feather but the Captain is on top form when mollifying hungover, yet still drunk wives. And yes, he does still love her, even when her hair and make up look like they crawled out of Malfeas. Promising to return when she’s had some more sleep, the Exalts decide to go visit Kejak Chejop.

After mastering the principles of Cloud Riding (and charging it to the Sidereals account) the Watch fly 500 miles to the Manse of Ivy, Chejops office in Heaven. Arriving at the forbidding manse, they think they hear voices from just beyond the door, and just out of audiability- like whispers. They cease as they put ear to door, and the portal swings open silently. Once inside, an Aranea secretary directs them past numberless blank doors (behind which the whispers of secrets kept never cease) into Chejops sanctum sanctorum.

In this room, filled with scrolls, maps, books, one-time pads, there is a desk piled high with paper stamped “Top Secret” and above it all, a massive orrery. A sharp-eyed Rav is a little curious as to why it seems to have six planets orbiting sun and moon and Creation, but keeps quiet.

Kejak greets them as warmly as any 3,000 Sidereal who planned the Usurption can. The Solars are polite and respectful back.

They talk of many things, which I summarise here.

Kejak says the Fate of Gem and Creation as a whole is still intertwined, but the Five Score Fraternity of the Stars is hard at work on correcting it. Of course, he agrees to Brands request that he expediate Brands presentation to the Committee for the Restoration of Auspicious Providence, but alas, as a mere humble functionary, it would be quite wrong of him to sway the Committee in any way.

Reporting on the Alchemical situation, the Lunar Ravitsu is worried that they have not yet seen these invaders from the Great Maker. Kejak is happy that they have been driven off and wonders aloud if perhaps the next step is to follow them back and see what their reality and world is like. Scout it out, like they scouted out Creation. The Exalts express guarded willingness.

Turning to domestic matters, Orchid wonders if Kejaks position of Permanent Undersecretary of Administrative Affairs to the Mouth of Peace could be used to restrain the Wyld Hunt that Master Tanaka is sure to raise on them.

“Alas, the Wyld Hunt is not at my beck and call” replies Kejak. Brand analyses this statement for truth with his Investigation Charms and concludes that while literally true, the less literal you get, the less true it becomes.

Discussion of Dragonblooded matters turns to the Realm Civil War, and the 3 potential candidates for the Imperial Throne- Mnemon, Cathak Cainan and the outside contender Tepet Ejava (the Roseblack). Kejak mentions how destructive any conflict would be, and the repercussions on the Threshold. Gem for example is seen as an important Cathak tributary, bankrolling Cainan’s Imperial ambitions. It would be likely that other contenders would like to sabotage that flow of wealth, whatever the human cost. Shizu is curious as to which candidate the people want. Kejak is a little perplexed by this, but replies that the Roseblack is seen as the more populist candidate.

After Kejak finishes congratulating them on their success in averting assorted Creation Threatening Events (CTE’s) Orchid is added to the hotlist for updates on emerging threats. Basically, when the Tapestry of Fate identifies a new major CTE, then an IM message is sent to all those on the hotlist. (we debate over whether the God of Infalliable Messenger is a spammer, and whether Celestial level sorcery lets you IM spam!), and with that, the Gem Exalts make their goodbye.

Making their way back to Burning Feathers home, the Watch find a party in full swing. Lots of Gods and cherubs, spirits and amusements are present as Burning Feather does her nightly socialising, booze and intoxicants flowing freely. Grala’s there, so is Wafting Sweetness (Ahlats ex.). Notable absences by Ahlat as a result, and also Ssseth (hostilities and social snubbing in full swing between Burning Feather and Ssseth)

The usual things happen at this party. People get sloshed. Others reveal inappropriate stories. Shizu gets into a cringingly embarrassing story about not knowing about the birds and the bees (despite having spied on the last dozen of Orchids affairs). A drunken Cherub enlists the Captain help in trying to shoot Shizu and a Fire Elemental with an Arrow of Love, but Shizu invokes Reflex Sidestep Techniqe and dodges- the Fire Elemental goes after a Fountain of Whiskey instead! Brand decides to try avoid the intoxicating smokes filling the mansion and do his homework for his presentation to CRAP tomorrow. Wafting Sweetness gets drunk and the Captain has to put her into a cab. But then the drunken Burning Feather suspects him of sneaking off with her best friend. Once more the Captains social graces seem to shine best when he’s drunk as he both mollifies and reassures BF that he is her greatest worshipper and most devoted husband.

Rav, Shizu and Orchid head out to get some air in the small hours. They pass Brand out in the gardens, perfecting his presentation. A little while after, Orchid gets a ‘Bingley Beep’ as an Infalliable Messenger informs her of the newest threat to Creation-

“The Watch Exalts of Gem”

Believing themselves set up by Kejak, the trio high tail it back to the mansion. Simultaneously, Brand notices Celestial Lions surrounding the perimeter of the grounds.

“Could you come with us Sir” asks a Lion.

“Why?”

“Theres a crime we’d like to stop. You can help us prevent it, if you come with us.”

“Sure… hold on, it hasn’t happened yet? And whats the crime?” Brand asks

“It’s a Pre-Crime Warrant, Sir. A threat to Creation. Just come with us” – noticeably the Lions don’t seem to want to step foot across the boundaries of Burning Feathers grounds. (they don’t yet have a warrant to enter the Sanctum of a Greater Gawd)

“Pre-Crime!?” as Brand realises that the Celestial Lions are not asking him to come along as a police consultant, but as a suspect! He and the others are being framed for a crime they have yet to commit!

At this point, Orchid, Shizu and Rav return to the party by jumping a Stormrider Whirlwind over the line of Celestial Lions and reach the temporary safety of Burning Feathers domain. Along the way, their whirlwind has crossed some red sand as it now has a flashy red streak in it. A-Team music plays, as

In 769, a crack Solar Circle was framed for a crime they have yet to commit. These Exalts promptly escaped from a maximum security Manse to the Yu Shan underground. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as soldier of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire... The S-Team!

So Ends Session 51

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