Latest revision as of 03:53, 9 June 2010

Schools of the Scarlet Empire

Overview

The Scarlet Empire trains its precious Magical Girls very intensely. Most end up attending one of the five special academies after their exaltation in Primary schooling. Two special academies exist also for those Magical Girls not born into a gang, who will need special training to catch up to their better trained brethren. Though some Magical Girls either fail to complete their studies or are called home to serve their families early, the ideal is to attend one of the five academies.

The House of...DEATH!!!!!

Helping you help others to die for their country since 36 SY

Do you like to kill people? Of course you do. At the House of...DEATH!!, young Magical Girls are put through a rigorous training program intended to turn them into killing machines. It also trains them to lead military units, thus facilitating slaughter on an even larger scale. The final exam takes several months and involves the cadets leading forces into the Threshold to sack and burn something. (On a few occasions, entire classes have flunked and been held back a year for SACKING THE WRONG THING. Ooops.)

The Escherite Academy

o/~ Hey, Mr. Tally Man, tally me Form 36-KB-308, 'Permission to engage your useless mortal child to a Yozi' o/~

This is the only advanced school in the realm which is bigger on the inside than the outside (unless you count Bratwurst, but who does besides those annoying sorcerors?) and definitely the only built using non-Euclidean geometry. Learning to navigate the building helps prepare the minds of students to navigate the impenetrable Imperial Bureaucracy.

The Escherite Academy trains up future bureaucrats, politicians, lawyers, and beancounters, teaching them how to use the government to advance their own goals, how to shift blame, and which form to use to have someone else executed after you murder your aunt.

The Seminary of Kawaii

The Cute Shall Inherit the Earth.

Not everyone who attends the Seminary of Kawaii is destined to enter the Kawaii Order; some attend because they are devout or because they want to learn how to kick people's heads off. With their nose.

Nevertheless, most people attend the Seminary of Kawaii in order to enter the Kawaii Order. It offers training in theology, philosophy, writing, preaching, kicking heads off (and other martial arts), history, spiritualism, and surviving on an oath of poverty.

Bratwurst Academy (The Pyramid)

Manticore loses twenty points for turning my hair purple!

Located on an island on the lonely northern coast of the Blessed Isle, this giant four-sided pyramid is the premiere magical academy of the Isle, where people go to learn sorcery and to engage in intense study of charms. Most of the Island's sorcerors gained their skills by studying here.

Students are divided into five 'Houses', which compete against each other for points; whichever house has the most points at the end of the year is rewarded with special sorcerous knowledge and artifacts and CANDY. Whoever gets the least will be mocked for all of eternity. The Houses are:

• Manticore: Self-righteous snots who think they are braver and more moral than everyone else.
• Sniveling: Arrogant whiners who think their bloodlines are the purest and everyone else should just give it up. They especially look down on anyone who comes of mixed heritage, or worse, was born into a mortal family. Or isn't fantastically wealthy. Or has bad hair. Or doesn't wear the latest fashion. Or...
• Kawaii: Obsessed with their own beauty, house Kawaii's members are in this to become EVEN PRETTIER THAN BEFORE. They reject all ugly things, like homework.
• Elephant: They say an Elephant never forgets. Nor will he let you forget he never forgets anything and is SMARTER THAN YOU WILL EVER BE. Ever.
• Puff'n'Stuff: This is the house where the uncool kids get put, the hard workers who will actually keep the Empire alive while the other four houses are busy getting themselves off on how great they are. Most quickly learn to keep their heads down until they graduate and get out of this asylum. House Puff'n'Stuff is also noted for its yearly 'Giant Demonic Puppet Festival', which involves creating huge marionettes controlled by demons, who then perform skits.

The Scarlet Institute For the Advancement of Arts and Sciences

o/~ I'm gonna make it to heaven / Light up the sky like a flame / Fame o/~ -- Sung while being burnt at the stake for heresy.

The SIFAAS is the newest academy, created at the request of one of Neo-Empress Scarlet's boytoys from a few centuries ago; it seeks to elevate the fine arts and humanistic studies among the Magical Girl community; unlike the other schools, it has a fair number of talented mortals as well, due to not having enough Magical Girl students to spend all of its money each year on. It is a hot bed of 'free thinking' and 'rebellion' (ie, lots of people getting drunk and playing petty pranks on authority figures or saying things to shock their elders.) The Empress tolerated it in order to provide a way to both let folks blow off steam and to identify the most dangerous threats to her rule in advance.

The curriculum of the SIFAAS covers the areas of drama, the fine arts, music, rhetoric and oratory, history, natural science, and astrology. Unofficially, it includes sex, debauchery, drunkeness, more sex, drugs, heresy, more drunkeness, yet more sex, and pornography. Graduates become fine public speakers and flamboyant performers and artists. Some also become skilled academics who will spend the rest of their lives desperately scrabbling to finance their research which no one will read because most of society is too busy chasing cute guys and girls to study.

But they're not bitter.

The Remedial Schools for Wayward Magical Girls

Two special schools are intended to train those Magical Girls born into non-noble families. (Some also are allowed to enter the Kawaii Order, but they are trained by an apprenticeship system.)

The Chrysalis Academy "Cliff Diving House"

He fell on his sword, fifteen times. Really.

Take the most brutal reform school you've ever seen, cross it with basic training for marines, turn the volume up to 20. That's the Chyrsalis Academy. Students are yelled at, abused, forced to run 30 laps around the mountain in heavy armor, and generally treated like garbage. Upperclassmen are allowed to use and abuse them at will. Members of the Girl Gangs are brought in just to abuse and mistreat them with no retribution allowed. All rules are bent to hose them. Finally, they are punished if they are ever not cute. Which is ALL THE TIME, under these conditions. The goal of all this is to get them used to what will happen to them once they leave; if they can take this, they can take anything.

An unfortunate side effect is a tendency for students to kill each other and instructors by throwing them off the cliffs around the mountain in the night, 'accidentally' driving blades through their eye sockets and into their brains during etiquette lessons, and so on. The other unfortunate side-effect is an utter obsession with being cute, which can lead to very strange behavior as well as making them blush a lot when complimented...

The Shadow Academy

Why would I wear the colors of the Otome if I wasn't one?

Those who do not join the Church or the Military are sent here, trained to become spies, the secret agents of the Empress. They learn how to pass themselves as members of any Gang, how to walk unseen, how to ingratiate themselves to others, how to steal people's underwear, etc.

Of course, with the Empress missing, the question arises of who all these spies are going to be serving...

Comments

• Back to the Exalted Kawaii Magical Girls Homepage
• Back to the Exalted Kawaii Homepage