SJE/Session54
SESSION 54 - The Five Commandments
21-23 Ascending Air
In Yu-Shan, the celebrations go on for some time. Shizu, however, is downcast. Once more, she has had a conversation with Sad Ivory, before it turned out that the Sidereal ninja "wasn't there after all".It seems that Sad Ivory admitted to the killing of Shizu's twin brother while insisting that she "wasn't there at the time". The assassin claimed that his death was all Shizu's fault - the twins shared a single strand of Destiny which had been split between them. So that it could be strengthened and the prophecy that one of them would be Exalted could be fulfilled, one of them had to be pruned away so that the other could grow stronger. Strangely, Shizu seems less than keen on finding Sad Ivory and smiting some sense into her.
"If you don't want revenge," Orchid wonders. "What exactly do you want?"
"I was thinking of something more long-term..."
"So, Brand smirks. "A long drawn-out struggle until you and Sad Ivory realise your secret passion for each other and settle down to train little ninjas together?"
"No," Shizu shudders. "Something that will mess up her and all her Bronze faction friends!"
"Why don't you have a good long think about what you'd like to do with Sad Ivory?" Orchid suggests, inspiring much smutty giggling in the filthy minds of her colleagues, which she loftily ignores. "And I'm sure we'll all see what we can do to lend a hand." (Cue yet more giggling).
Shizu visits Rulen, God of Mathematics, about the strange events around his temple in Gem. Rulen can add nothing useful, finding it inconceivable that the sacred ledger could be incorrect, so Shizu goes to consult the security log at the gates of Heaven. "It is quite simple to gain access to the log," the Celestial Lion on duty advises her. "Simply apply at the Ministry of Admissions."
"Right, and where would that be?"
"At the Hall of Clerks."
"Um..."
"500 miles that way."
"Ah..."
Orchid talks to Burning Feather, who is in a state of maudlin drunkenness. After reassuring the goddess that, yes, she is sure that the Captain is truly devoted to her, Orchid asks Burning Feather to promise her that she will never do anything to hurt Captain Ibrahim. "He is an idiot and a drunken buffoon," Orchid confides. "But I do care about him." She pauses for a moment, hardly able to believe what she's hearing herself say. "You won't tell anyone I said that, will you?" She anxiously inquires. Alas, her caution may be too late - Ssseth has spies everywhere...
Alana consults Ayesha Ura about Solaria - the whole country seems to be dropping in and out of Fate at present. Something must be done urgently. Ayesha wonders if this could be the work of a Deathlord, so Alana shares what the Circle has learned about the Princess Magnificent. She is worried that this powerful being may be beyond her abilities, and wonders if Ayesha can offer any assistance. Sadly, the Underworld has never been a high priority for the Sidereals, though it is said that one among their number - the Green Lady - is a noted expert on the subject.
The Captain, fully healed by the celestial wine and feeling confident, heads to where he left the God of Mimes locked to a fence with imaginary handcuffs. "..." has made his escape, and the Captain trips over something that's not really there - the discarded handcuffs. He picks them up and places them on his belt next to his 'real' handcuffs. Back at his wife's house, he has one of her cherubs write a letter to the Yu-Shan Times, decrying the evils of mime and pointing out its corrosive influence on the youth of today. Then he gets drunk. Again.
Ravitsu goes sight-seeing, familiarising himself with how things have changed since his First Age incarnation was in Yu-Shan. He finds glorious manses, verdant parks, lush orchards. In the wilder areas of Heaven, he seeks out gods who have been friendly to Luna and her chosen in the past. He talks with various gods of the wild and of the hunt, and learns that many mammoth spirits and totems have allied themself with Yurgen Kaneko in his war. He also faces a certain amount of hostility - Ravitsu's part in the humbling of Amoth City-Smiter is less than popular with the barbarian gods of the wild. "I was only defending my territory, you know!" Ravitsu's forceful words earn him back some of the respect that he has lost, though Amoth's allies are still rather hostile.
Unlike the others, Brand does not linger in Heaven, but goes straight home to Gem. He finds it a cleaner, shinier place; the walls are repaired, stronger and higher than they ever were; the people walk a little taller, with only a hint of their habitual criminal slouch, though some are a little confused because they'd been sure they were dead. Brand takes some comfort in walking his old familiar beat, taking some time to himself to drink in the smells, sights and sounds of his home city. After a rousing game of "throw rocks at the copper" with some local urchins, he returns to the watchtower (now made of gold!). All has not gone perfectly, however, with Brand's alterations at the Loom of Fate. Disastrously, the tea urn in the Watch canteen has been made as new. The decades of flavour that lingered in the accumulation of gunk at the bottom of the urn are lost forever. Tragedy! To console himself, he settles down in his workshop to tinker with shiny new gadgets.
24 Ascending Air
In Yu-Shan, Shizu rejoins the others, having finally completed the epic trip to the Hall of Clerks. She brings with her forms to be filled in, and the latest issue of the Yu-Shan Times. While Alana helps her with this paperwork, the Captain is thrilled to see a large picture of himself on the front page of the newspaper. Orchid spies the headline - 'MY SECRET LOVE FOR CAPTAIN': ORCHID CONFESSES - and snatches the paper away. With mounting horror, she reads the main stories of the day: a picture of the Captain miming, as he "handcuffs" the God of Mimes is set alongside his letter, discrediting him as a mime sympathiser; the God of Ninjas denounces Shizu as "Not one of mine..."; worst of all is the featured interview - Ssseth quizzing Burning Feather on the state of her relationship with the Captain! "There are three of us in this marriage," she is quoted as having said. Orchid echoes this aloud in disbelief.
Misunderstanding entirely, the Captain is thrilled. "Ah, she must be talking about my 'Little Captain'!" He brags, reaching to take the paper back. Orchid dodges away. "You can't have it," she desperately stalls, unwilling to give it back to him in case he finds someone who can actually read it to him. "I'm... erm... going to have the picture of you framed! It will look marvellous in your office..." Her appeal to Captain Ibrahim's ego is successful, and Orchid slips away as the Circle prepares for their return to Gem.
Back in Gem, Shizu, impressed by how much things have changed, canvasses her fellow watchmen for their opinions on mimes. Hearing the usual sentiments - "Hanging's too good for 'em, sling 'em in the scorpion pit!" - she concludes that things can't have changed that much, after all.
After this, she joins Alana in visiting the Immaculate Temple, which has now been replaced with a bar dedicated to Burning Feather, crowded with the Captain's eager followers. The Captain himself is already there, paying most enthusiastic homage to his wife's alcoholic bounty. Over drinks, his followers do share some troubling news with him - it seems that pale youngsters dressed all in black have been seen hanging around the Hot District cemetaries at night, calling themselves the "anti-Church" or some such. The Captain adds it to his list of evil plots against Gem. Probably something to do with mimes... As the drinking session winds down, he orders some of his followers to go to Orchid's hunting lodge, to begin work on turning it into a training camp, with a temple and lake.
Alana & Shizu move on to the Cult of the Illuminated safe house, where Cathak Anaria is still fanatically worshipping. "Kowtow, worthless dogs!" She commands as she notices the two Solars. "The shining ones are before you!"
Alana, rather embarrassed by the attention, hustles her cousin into a side room. Anaria kneels before her: "Cousin, if I may still call you this, o shining light of the heavens! Have you returned from the heavenly city with tablets of gold, inscribed with the commandments we must follow!" Alana is mortified: "Oh, shit!" she thinks. "I knew I forgot something... She leaves Anaria deep in conversation with Shizu and dashes back to the Golden Watchtower to work on them.
Shizu attempts small talk with Anaria, but is driven inexorably onto the rocks of her fanaticism:
"So, Anaria, have you spoken to your old Immaculate friends?"
"Yes, shining one, we have made many converts among the poor misguided fools! We preach to them with furious vigour!"
"Good, good..." Shizu nervously changes the subject before Anaria begins to froth at the mouth. "And how's Cathak Aron getting along, then?"
"He falls prey to debauchery, but we will show him the true path!"
"Oh, same as ever..."
At the Golden Watchtower, Alana compiles the first commandments of the new church:
1. THE UNCONQUERED SUN IS THE GREATEST OF THE GODS.
2. THE SOLAR EXALTED ARE HIS HOLY MESSENGERS.
3. THOU SHALT NOT BELIEVE THE MISGUIDED LIES OF THE IMMACULATE ORDER.
4. THOU SHALT ACT IN A RIGHTEOUS AND JUST MANNER.
5. THOU SHALT NOT WORSHIP THE DEAD.
Orchid is a little worried about this last one. "Exactly how," she asks Alana. "Are you defining 'worship' in this instance?"
"Why do you ask?"
"I don't want to be burned at the stake because your little friends read some tawdry tabloid gossip about my private life that, I might add, gives an entirely misleading impression of my actions."
"Are the Abyssals actually dead?"
"Perhaps not, but people see the funereal clothes, the grave goods, the skulls, their death-like pallor and cold embraces and jump to all sorts of hasty conclusions..."
Despite Orchid's misgivings, the commandment stays in the list.
Shizu receives a reply to her query about the gates of Heaven, in the form of a list of gods and spirits passing in and out of the gate nearest to Gem. Most appear innocuous but one, just before the strangeness at Rulen's temple, has been sealed under the orders of the Bureau of Destiny. Clearly, dirty work is afoot...
Orchid returns to her house to find it all restored to much as it was before her evil counterpart burned it down. Even her household staff have been returned to her. There are certain small differences, though, most notably a huge Socialist Realist mural of Brand, cuppa in hand, in her parlour and... a mysterious new doorway under the stairs, opening upon a hallway that leads down into darkness. A chill wind rises up from the depths, carrying ghostly voices. "Oh, dear..." Orchid slams the door, props a chair under the handle to stop it being opened from the other side and fetches Brand. Together, they work a mighty warding against the dead, and brick up the doorway. Orchid does leave a note on the other side for the Maiden Of The Mirthless Smile: "I'm not sure if this has anything to do with you but, if it has, don't take the warding personally. Call me!"
Orchid then reviews her household staff, and is thrilled to find that Hans the Masseur has been restored to her. One small problem presents itself, in that Orchid now has two accountants. She settles the dispute with a simple written test:
1. Will you let Orchid buy a bireme? (YES/NO)
2. Will you let Orchid buy a mammoth? (YES/NO)
3. Tie breaker - I want to work for Orchid because... (answer in no more than 25 words)
Orchid fires Numerate Weasel and keeps on her old accountant who, now, dares not defy her whims. She commands him to place an order for a bireme immediately.
After this domestic business has been dealt with, Orchid invites the circle round for dinner in her newly-restored, and now not gothic at all, house. Discussion turns around what must be done next. A road trip is on the cards, which will take in the Abyssal menace in Solaria, exploring past lives and secrets in Nexus, saving Northolm and dealing with the Wyld Hunt.
Brand, having had several days to tinker, has come up with a cunning gadget so that the Circle will know if any danger threatens Gem in their absence. He has made a matched pair of jewelled pendants, one for him to wear, and one which has has given to ??????. If the jewel in either pendant is broken, the other will also shatter. If the Wyld Hunt, or any danger, turns up while the circle is out of town, ????? can alert Brand. And so it is decided that the Circle will go on a road trip - first, to Solaria, then Nexus, then Northolm.
As the Circle winds down with after-dinner drinks, a hollow knocking begins behind the bricked-up door. "Is that you, Maiden?" Orchid enquires. But there is no reply, other than an eerie knock, knock, knock...
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