Xilanada - Pursuit Of Regretted Truths/Part 1

The 27th Day of Descending Wood, 766 in the Year of Our Empress.

"You're telling me that you guaranteed a Cynis a dozen Exalted children because she was that good a lay?"

"If you'd had a piece of her, you would have too. Hell, one of them's probably mine already!"

Sen snickered as E'lial leaned back in his chair. Empty bottles and empty glasses littered the side-tables of the lounge from a long night of carousing. They were down to opium pipes, sadly. It wasn't bad, mind you. But even opium and a night of good conversation couldn't distract Sen from his heavy heart.

"I could use your advice, old man," Sen said at last. "Xilanada...I've already talked about her all night. But I haven't...figured out where she and I are going. I love her, E'lial, I mean I love her enough to marry her. In fact, I want to. I don't want any woman but her. Hesiesh, I don't even want another lover. The way I've been lately, I don't think even your Cynis could tempt me."

"Then marry her," E'lial said, taking a long drag on his pipe. "Easy advice."

"Not so easy to do." Sen was sober as he said it, despite the drugs. "House Tepet wants to save me for an advantageous marriage. If I married her, how could I serve my House in that way? I know for a fact they need connections more than they ever have, E'lial. How can I do that to my House?"

"How can you do it to yourself?" the silver-haired Sidereal said with a sardonic smirk. "If you really loved her, there's nothing you wouldn't do to make her yours."

"You know how politics work, old man. It's not that simple."

"Yes it is." The Officer of Imperial Security leaned forward and gestured dramatically with his pipe. "You search your heart and you find out if she's the one. You search until you know if there's doubt or if there's none. If you doubt, turn her aside and do your duty. If there's no doubt...then you move Heaven and Earth to be with her. There is no sacrifice too great, no price too large, Sen. If she is your true love, then you love her all the days of your existence because...without love, there's nothing."

"Why, E'lial, I never thought I'd ever hear you wax all poetic about love," Sen chuckled. He puffed contentedly on his pipe. "Who was she?"

"Oh, just someone I knew," E'lial said, with that distant smile that came from reminiscing. "She died a very long time ago. But while she lived...there was nothing I wouldn't do for her. I'd give anything to have her love again, Sen. So don't lose your chance. You find her, you marry her, have lots of children with her, and you die an old man with her. Trust me, its worth it."

"If only she were an Exalt," Sen said with resigned sorrow. "As it is, any mortal children and grandchildren of ours will be dead before I will be. Just like she will be."

"Ah yes..." E'lial said, lingering on the last syllable. "About that. I think it's time for you to go find her."

"I think so too," Sen said, rising out of his chair and stretching. "Say, you never did tell me why you came here tonight...or yesterday or whenever it is. What brings you to Nexus?"

"In a way, you do. But mostly, I'm here because of Xilanada." E'lial's habitual grin had long since parted during that serious talk about love. Now, his face was hard. "Time for the unpleasant part of my business here. Sit down, shut up and don't open your mouth until I've said what I have to say."

Bemused, Sen shrugged and settled back into his chair.

"Xilanada was captured last night, Sen. She's being held on the 8th floor of the Guild's Tower, in the private quarters of a Factor Auris Leestra. He believes he's taken his property back. She believes otherwise and I'm sure you do too. Don't worry about the Factor, he's dead already. However, in two hours, Xilanada is going to need to be gone from that place. I think you can make it there in...what, an hour? Plenty of time."

"...how much opium did you just inhale?" Sen said. He didn't laugh at the joke either because he knew E'lial wasn't joking. The Sidereal was too deadly certain. The crimson hue of his eyes, so strangely unremarkable, gleamed in the firelight like blood.

"You know better. Your girl needs rescuing. Go to it."

"I have two hours, like you said," Sen said with an indifference he didn't feel. "I suppose the real question is...why did you keep me here? What had to happen, E'lial? Tell me plainly, why was it so important that you accost me and we drink the night away? You were keeping me from catching the kidnappers. You were keeping me from picking up her trail and following her. Why?"

"Damnit, you're good." E'lial grinned roguishly and wagged a finger at him. "Some of my kind underestimate yours because of the limits of elemental Exaltation. Your mind is plenty sharp, that's what they forget. Everything you just said was true." He stretched in his chair and settled back to puff at his pipe.

"How about a little truth from you, then?" Sen demanded.

"Kid, if I told you half the truthful things I knew, you'd cut your stomach open and strangle yourself with your own entrails. After you stabbed out your eyes and punctured your ears. In some ways, you're going to find the truth of last night even worse than those other things and for that I'm sorry. I won't get a chance to say it later so I'll say it now. I like you. But some pain is meant to be and some battles must be fought, whether you want them or not."

"Get on with it then." Sen felt the heat from the fireplace as the flames reacted to his growing rage. Even his opium pipe was starting to smoke from more than the poppy. "Just...tell me what you can."

"The future is a vast Tapestry, Sen. Everyone's thread makes up a part of it. Some people are brighter threads than others and there's always the few that form the outline of a picture, the ones who will shape the outcome of a region." E'lial gestured at him with the pipe, jabbing like a knife would.

"And you're telling me I'm one of those threads?"

"Heh. Uh...no, kid. But Xilanada is."

Sen's eyebrows raised at that proclamation. She'd always been mysterious and he always knew there was more going on in her mind than she let on. But it was once thing to ponder the minor mysteries of a supposedly amnesic schoolteacher. It was another to hear a Star-Child, a Chosen of Battles Sidereal, say that she could shape the future of the East.

"Do I fit in?" Sen asked at last, unable to hide the spreading bitterness in his heart. "Or am I going to be woven out of the picture? I'm not a fool. I know others pursue her, even an Anathema. Do I have a chance?"

"You have a chance, Sen," E'lial sighed wearily. "That's why I delayed you. I had to let some things happen or they'd happen at different times and the outcome would not be so good. It comes down to this. There's a couple of ways Xilanada can go with her future. Which way she takes will be the result of the choices she makes, another makes...and the choices you make."

"Very helpful," Sen snorted.

"You're going to be miserable today, I won't lie to you. But you know there's more to my story than the label of Anathema. There's more to her story too, and more than one way to interpret the tale. Keep your mind open...and remember your heart. Remember that great love you spent all night telling me about. After today, search that heart. If you find doubt, do what you must do and let Xilanada do what she must. If your love is pure, though...move Heaven for her, Sen. She's worth it and you might save more than her soul or yours."

"Enough of this." Sen stood and threw his pipe into the fire. It had already blackened to the point of cracking. Useless now, just like he'd been. "One way or the other, I'm being moved into a trap and I know it. You have your wish, E'lial. I stayed the night and I'm going to be at that tower in the next hour. But when this is all over...it may be you I come after. And no prediction, no star watching, no Celestial Sorcery is going to protect you from me."

E'lial didn't snicker, only nodded respectfully as he stiffly rose to his feet. He cocked his head to the side, popping it, and slipped his feet back into those garishly yellow boots he wore. Sweeping his hat from a nearby table, E'lial sank into a deep bow.

"Tepet Ajalat Sen...may the Maidens watch over you. May Mercury take you to your destination, may Jupiter show you the truth, may Mars give you success, may Venus bless the result and may Saturn give you an End to all of your heartache one way or the other. Fight for her, kid. It's up to you now."

With that, E'lial stepped back into the thin air he'd come from.

Sen brooded as he stared where the Sidereal had just been. Scarlet Rain, his old teacher and one of the secret Anathema, had come all this way to move him, like his kind did with all the pieces they had. Was Xilanada truly the object of this game? Was she so important?

Did he love her any less?

Grinding his teeth, Sen leapt to his feet and snatched Crimson Laughter from his sleeve. He had a feeling he'd need it before long.