Acantha/UselessSolars

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The Solars Who Don't Do Anything

So, Veggietales has this song called "The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything," about (predictably) a set of pirates who don't do anything. Well, after a few sessions of last year's Exalted game, I figured out that the PCs (Solars, all of them) weren't really doing anything. And so I wrote this song.

The PCs: Lee (first verse), a ten-year-old Twilight; Nuray (second verse), a Night caste pirate and by far the most useless; and Saieko (verses three and four), the Dawn caste and pathological liar. And yes, she did once tell Lee that her bones would melt if she didn't eat her vegetables.

The Solars Who Don't Do Anything

CHORUS:
We are the Solars who don't do anything
We just stay home and lie around
And if you ask us to do anything
We'll just tell you... We don't do anything!

VERSE 1:
Oh, I've never been to Lookshy
And I've never been to Larjin
And I've never found a daiklave under Onyx or Whitewall
And I've never been to Rathess
And I've never been to Crystal
And I've never been to Nexus in the fall!

CHORUS:
We are the Solars who don't do anything
We just stay home and lie around
And if you ask us to do anything
We'll just tell you... We don't do anything!

VERSE 2:
And I've never fought siaka
And I've never killed a kraken
And I've never used a Sail charm 'cause I've hardly sailed at all
And I've never been to Azure
And I've never fought the Lintha
And I've never been to Nexus in the fall!

CHORUS:
We are the Solars who don't do anything
We just stay home and lie around
And if you ask us to do anything
We'll just tell you... We don't do anything!

VERSE 3:
Oh, I've danced with Ma-Ha-Suchi
And I slapped the Scarlet Empress
And I killed the Mask of Winters with my shiny golden sword
And I made a cloak of Fair Folk
And I always eat my veggies (because if you don't, your bones will melt)
And I've never been to Nexus in the fall!

VERSE 4:
Oh, I've made a pact with Mara
And I sparred with Chejop Kejak
And I use a Flying Guillotine without Occult at all
And I like to drink with Lunars
And I made out with a deathknight...
And I've never been Anathema at all!

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